PHOTO EPISTLE #30-WEEPING

With so much loss in the news these days, many of us are reminded of our own losses and find ourselves reliving them to one degree or another. As we watch the news of the recent outbreak of tornadoes, some of us find tears rolling down our cheeks as we see others suffering. It’s funny how emotions can be contagious. I’m easily brought to both laughter by others laughing and crying by others crying. I remember shooting the above photo and tearing up as I shot this photo. You may be thinking this was from a tragic news event. It was for these two girls who thought they would never see each other again after learning their school was being closed and they would be attending different schools. I felt so silly for getting emotional:)

No matter how minor the loss is, they serve as mile markers in our lives, especially our major losses. Before I had become a Christian, I thought is was weak to show my emotions for loss. Like most my guy friends, I would just put on a stern face and pack it down. As a news photographer, there is a lot to pack down over time. Shortly after becoming a Christian I covered my last news assignment in my career for Newsweek Magazine of teens being rescued from a flooding river in Central Texas. Some of those rescues did not pan out as we all could only stand and watch as teens drowned and I found that my heart was no longer cold and could not just pack it away. I lost it, deeply crying on and off for a week or so. It was as if the Holy Spirit was grieving and took me along, leading me in how to weep deeply. I had never cried like that before. I was pleased to find that scripture teaches us that weeping, not just crying can be a very good thing.

Unfortunately, weeping has become a major part of mine and my wife’s lives. In 1996 we lost one of our sons to a tragic accident. Like all who suffer a great loss, we were given the choice to become bitter or better. There is no doubt that one of the choices for becoming bitter is to refuse to weep. Not cry, which comes more from the surface of our hearts, but weep, which seems to come from down deep. In fact, after truly weeping, most feel that similar relief which comes from physically throwing up. I often jokingly refer to weeping as emotionally throwing up. A major part of becoming better after a major loss is weeping. There is something that is released from down deep, which helps you continue on with joy. You never get over losing a loved one. The pain comes and goes in cycles for the rest of your life. I’ve learned to allow myself to weep. If I don’t, then anger surfaces and I find myself retreating away from everyone. When one of us gets like this, we just pull out the photos of Ryan and allow ourselves to weep. When we are all wept out, the photos are put away, knowing the hope we have in Christ for seeing Ryan again and our joy returns, giving birth to a new cycle. There are all kinds of articles on how crying and weeping is so good for people both emotionally and physically. There is no formula for grieving, all do it differently, but weeping is part of those who become better rather than bitter. One of my favorite scriptures is Psalm 30:5 “For his anger lasts only a moment, but his favor lasts a lifetime; weeping may stay for the night, but rejoicing comes in the morning.” Oh how true this is! Of course there is also what is known as the shortest verse in the bible, John 11:35 “Jesus wept.” However, as comforting as this is for us to know Jesus weeps for us, is how Jesus was influenced by the weeping of others to weep. (John 11:33). Finally, notice how the Jews were also comforted by his weeping in verse 36 “Then the Jews said, “See how he loved him!” “. When we weep, we can be sure that our loving Father in Heaven is also moved to not just a few tears, but a flood of tears by our grief. I personally have found comfort in the past as my wife and children or some friends have just wept with me during my times of tears. Even more so, when I have felt The Holy Spirit moved to tears and weep with me as I weep.

the Jesusfreak